In a recent article that I shared with you about social media, I mentioned that my wife and I would be collaborating on a more positive and helpful article regarding our practices and habits with different social forums. Below, you will find a summary of a number of discussions that Sandy and I have had and we hope that our discussions will prove beneficial for you as well.
Please understand that we as a couple are claiming neither to be experts nor to be the moral authorities on your tweeting or FB activity. Our simple goal in this post is to pastorally share with our people some of the things we have been able to discern and then pass them along for positive and constructive communication within our ministries.
As I mentioned, you will find our summary of many good and at times, aggravating discussions. Ya, you read that correctly, aggravating. We are married and marriage is one holy, spicy minestrone of two very different people bound together and commanded to make it work. Don’t you just love it? So, here’s the simple rule: if you like something, it came from Sandy…if you don’t, it also came from Sandy. Fair enough. Let’s go avanti!
- Communicate a great image — We Christians often forget that our words don’t belong to us but to the one who has redeemed us. What we communicate is a representation of who Jesus is. And, as soon as we share or click-on items in social media, we are communicating openly.
A practical application of this can simply be found in the automatically generated articles, pictures, game achievements, and horoscopes. We should strive to be alert to what is being communicated. Do these things represent Jesus well?
- Avoid foolish arguments that never cease — This is an oft-forgotten biblical injunction. There’s not too much more to add to this one.
- Keep it positive and light because it is so easy to forget who is on your friend list. Once our friends list reaches triple digits, we begin to broadcast more than “share”. We may be expressing an opinion that we feel should be heard, but have we passed it through the filter that it could hurt or offend someone publicly? Similar to email, status updates have a major disadvantage — they cannot express authenticity and emotive genuineness. It seems a bit obvious to say, but we should remind ourselves to avoid embattled language and any hints of hatred toward anyone (including those who work at the Casa Bianca). Are we possibly doing damage to our “in-person” relationships? This is one reason that we like private groups because the personal friends that we invite have most likely had genuine interaction with us. They can “hear” our voices in our updates and give us a deeper level of understanding (if not tolerance) because they have already encountered our authenticity in-person.
- Post things that count; not items that say “look at me here! … and now! … and again!. . . and now. . . and now again. . . . . . .” yup. no likes.
- Watch the pictures you post. Social media is really capitalizing on photos and videos. Again, remember that we all take for granted just how public these sites are. Once you upload a photo, you have surrendered its rights to the company. It’s no longer yours. Also, more people than you realize may see the photo. To give some examples, we have seen vengeance photos uploaded. This is when someone is trying to get back at another person in some way. So, they post a kind of “in-your-face” picture. “Vengeance is mine and not the domain of social media, says the Lord.” Two other examples could be posting photos that are compromising or immodest and pictures of moments and places that should just remain private within a marriage or family. It will actually take a good deal of discernment and a desire to only share that which is truly beautiful, uplifting, or hilarious.
- Build others up — We call this body-building and wrote an article on it here. On social media, we can post comments to let others know that this person is doing a good job. It might be that others don’t see that side of them. This encourages the whole body when we express gratitude. It also challenges people to join-in service to others. We can really leverage the organization of social media for thoughtful and caring activities, too.
- Don’t buy the ads. We might think that the adverts are mostly about things that we want. However, it’s not about the stuff, it’s the medium that we’re supporting to get the stuff. Many reports have been written showing that you are the ad. Don’t contribute to the consumption of people. With all of the data that the social mediums are collecting, they will sell you to others if they’re not already doing it.
- To FB, time is money – but not to Christ. Time on FB is more of a chance to make money from you or your friends or to gather information to make future money. However, for the believer, time is not money – time is morality. Remember that the time you take to be on FB is time you have taken from someone or something else.¹ Let’s just throw in a verse from Paul here, “Making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:16) In other words, we need to watch our time on things like this because those who care only for their appetites will consume it and try to get us to do the same. In fact, we believe FB will push the envelope more and more in ethics because its revenues are falling. If you are a Christ-follower, you have a moral obligation to devote one of your most precious gifts, your time, to the pleasure and will of God.
- Be in community — social media does have an ironic benefit in this area. Social media appears to work best for those communities that have already developed outside of the social medium first.
- Bless creatively — utilize Scripture in a positive way. Summarize biblical truths and blessings when you can. Some people just blast verses out there and they come-off like, “I’m a Christian,so deal with it.” How counter-productive is that? Most likely, we all have friends who don’t like it when we are “preachy” even if being preachy was not our intent. If God has done something wonderful in your life, thank him humbly for it and give grace to those who hear.
¹for more Gospel-oriented insights on time, image-presentation, and building real relationships, you can check out Tim Chester’s 7-part series called Will You Be My Facebook Friend?